It feels like deja vu today. Twice today I had a conversation with the value of a blog. The first encounter occurred on Inside Higher Ed when a doctoral student wrote a piece discussing the value of a blog she created to document her journey. Second, I spoke with the future Dr. K (who will defend later this month) about his desire to keep a blog for his company. It all made me think about this blog and why I started it in the first place. For me, it was to document my journey through life as well as this dissertation. A year has past since my last post and so much has changed. I have yet to defend, but that time is coming soon. Needless to say, I was able to find solace with my journey with the help of Twitter. Of course Twitter forces one to keep their thoughts to 40 characters or less. It definitely made me stay focused on what I had to say. It was a great alternative to having to think in long sentences about what was going on in my life.
So today I can can report that I am 2 months away from defending my dissertation. I was supposed to re-start chapter 4 today, but as you can see I’ve been sidetracked. Doing everything from talking on the phone, to cleaning my house which has been neglected for the past couple of weeks, to sitting outside on the deck like normal people who have a life. I can hardly wait to see what that feels like. To be normal. To be bored. To have nothing to do. To have things to do. I will finally have the option to do everything I want to do or nothing at all. I can’t wait for that day to come.
So as I move forward on this journey I am nervously anticipating the future and what it holds. I have no idea who will be there with me in the end. Being on this journey has been lonely at times. Keeping friendships and having a relationship has been very difficult. People don’t realize that it doesn’t feel good to have to deliberately be selfish with my time. I’d much rather be hanging out with everyone else. Unfortunately, I would never reach my goal if I did. The sacrifices have been hard and the road has been long. I just have to believe that the path I’ve chosen is better than the one that I’ve left behind.
Kole
The Kole Chronicles 